Doug, I know this was you.

[xp_tarot]

Stop leaving these on my desk printed out like fortune cookie slips..

"How come reading tea leaves is seen as this sophisticated, witchy thing but if I slam dunk an open can of Chef Boyardee ravioli onto the pavement in the gas station parking lot to see what kind of soda the old ones think I should buy, foodstuff divination suddenly isn’t cool anymore?"

Comments

[xp_cypher]

[xp_darcy]

wouldn't the canned alphabet stuff make more sense for divination?

[xp_shadowcat]

Let's try it and see.

[xp_tarot]

As long as I do not have to eat the tinned pasta I will provide assistance.

[xp_shadowcat]

Does anyone actually eat those? I always thought they were manufactured to make young children stare in horror.

[xp_tarot]

Much to my disappointment I have two co-workers, an ex-faux-boyfriend and perhaps a current partner who eats those.

[xp_shadowcat]

....do you think SCOTT eats them?

[xp_tarot]

I wish to say no because I like you but I can honestly picture Scott eating from tinned pasta while doing repairs to the plane.

[xp_jubilee]

Why are you disappointed? They’re awesome. Now, if they start talking to Amanda, then it’s time to worry.

[xp_blackcat]

Noooo not you too; obvs low effort and/or heist food is always a loaf of bread and cheese + cold cuts come ON.

[xp_cypher]

p sure it's three coworkers, btw

(I will neither confirm nor deny)

[xp_tarot]

We have two confessions here and I have personal observation of one more. I am distraught.

[xp_scarlet_witch]

True story: we once had to wean my twin brother off of those horrible things after he went an entire month of eating only that.

[xp_tarot]

Oh no

[xp_scarlet_witch]

Oh yes. I was quite delighted at the time, if I remember correctly.

Though, speed powers + immense amounts of canned pasta do not bode well for anyone.

[xp_darcy]

I will eat the tinned pasta FOR SCIENCE and because I like them. They are delicious with puffy cheetos.

[xp_darcy]

Actually maybe FOR MAGIC or FOR DIVINATION in this case.

[xp_tarot]

I predict indigestion and heartburn.

[xp_darcy]

Oh no, I eat the ones that don't have the meatballs in them.

[xp_topaz]

Pretty sure there's nothing magical about them. It's okay to just say you have terrible taste in food. No one is judging.

[xp_tarot]

The magic is in the divination via pasta on linoleum, not the pasta itself.

[xp_darcy]

You are absolutely judging, but since your idea of nutrition is "just never remember to eat" I'm going to assume your dragon is hangry and needs a bowl of pasta rings.

[xp_whitequeen]

I live amongst philistines.

This is not a complaint. Merely an observation.

Also, Douglas, well done on the food divination. Best use for a “can of Chef Boyardee ravioli” I could think of. And then maybe some poor homeless dog will eat it all and be happy and fed and the world will be an infinitesimally better place. All because of you, darling.

[xp_cypher]

service is its own reward and all that

[xp_tarot]

I wanted to feed the pavement pasta to Clinton's adopted terror squid, but I warned they may be on a very documented science diet and I would ruin the science and lose a gold star and so I did not.

I fed the pavement pasta to the dog.